Saturday, 31 December 2011

  • Goodbye 2011, goodbye blog

    Happy new year everyone!

    Gotta say, 2011 wasn't exactly the best year for me and it felt like the longest year i’ve ever lived.....it's been 3 months since I last visit this blog, but I felt like I needed to close the year 2011 with a final post before I abandon this blog....
    I think it's been a bit of a hassle and a chore to blog. I really love blogging, but it's just that things have really picked up and I've had my hands full with various responsibilities and activities.
    Nevertheless, as my final post...I'd like to review how 2011 went for me.
    Call it a thanksgiving post, but this will certainly be a lot of that.

    2011 as every other year turned out to be another eventful year for me.
    I think the best part about life is not knowing what comes next, which can also be the downside of life.
    But when you've got God watching your back, you cannot be more prepared than that to face life.

    • Ups and downs,
    • Smiles and frowns,
    • Laughter and tears,
    • Joy and fears,


    I think there were too many moments that is of significant mention but absolutely cannot be listed down, because it'll take forever.
    Maybe just a run through of the more significant events...

    •     Started to pursue Medicine.
    •     Met and made new friends whom I cannot be more thankful for.
    •     Went through a personal tough time in life carried over from the previous year
    •     Grew close with some people and unfortunately, strayed away from a few others.
    •     Started juggling between work and studies.

       
    There's been such a mixed of emotions  throughout the entire year,  but I know for a fact that if it was not for God...    I honestly would not have had the courage and purpose to persevere on.

    As I close this post (and coincidentally, this blog) with this final post, I'd like to thank all of my friends who have never left my side regardless of how i've treated them. And i love you guys from the bottom of my heart. I'm one who honestly appreciates friendship a whole lot. The year 2011 was crazy in the sense that i've lost some really good friends due to misunderstandings and mistakes made on my part. Friends are real treasures that I hold close to my heart. I love you all guys.

    There's so many things to be thankful for, but i'll stop here. It;s been an awesome year but i'm looking forward to 2012

    I know whatever happens next, God will bring me through to yet another year as I continue to live this life to fulfill His plans and purposes in my life.

    I pray for the best to every single one of you reading this right now that the year 2012 will be one of prosperity, abundance, and a year of awesomeness.


    God bless......

     

     

    -cezar


Saturday, 03 September 2011

  • .....


    I need to refrain myself from coming to this page whenever I'm feeling emotionally distraught. Seriously, I am sick of myself for being like this.

    Things will always get better, right? I just don't know when.



Friday, 19 August 2011

  • From now onwards, I'm going to take extra caution on which friends I actually choose to trust. After the initial pissed off stage, I now feel saddened by it all.

     

    Thank you.

     

    -ZAR

     

Wednesday, 17 August 2011

  • Been trying

    It's weird how all my thoughts start flowing when I'm trying to sleep. I form perfect compositions in my head, filled with all the things that I want to say. But alas, I get too tired to switch the computer on, and the moment disappears.

    When I really do get the chance to face this page and churn out a post, it's like I've to try. Sentences seem chunky and paragraphs seem incoherent, and I don't remember even a quarter of whatever I meant to say.

    I just feel a little lost right now. It's like the whole world is so big and I am nothing but an insignificant speck of dust. Some days, I get so scared of the future that I wish so badly for time to stop. I want to forever be here, in my comfort zone. There's always that feeling of wondering if I'll just suck at life. Success and happiness, are they going to be mine?

    I don't really have a contingency plan for my life. The only plan I do have is that everything goes according to plan, if that makes any sense.

    On top of everything else, I am struggling to close that chapter of my life and put it behind me. A huge void has replaced where you once were. Everything just feels so different now because it's just me and me alone. When people ask me about what happened, I either feel a jab right where my heart is, or I am inflicted with that searing pain you get from a quick slice. Whichever way, it hurts just the same.

    I am conveniently blocking things out and keeping myself busy. It's amazing just how long I can remain in denial, but the moment I accidentally let my guard slip, even just for a little bit, I find myself drowning in so much pain.

    So, that's me lately..

     

Friday, 12 August 2011

  • not this time

     

    Currently, right now at this moment, there are so many things on my mind, that’s bombarding me and making me  down.

    But, again. i can’t afford to be down at this moment, or for the next two weeks..

    what the eff right?

     

  • Sometimes


        sometimes… I just linger like a soul without a body… looking for a body, another soul, an unending journey. again.,



        Just smile. remember?
        

     

Friday, 08 July 2011

  • Fights

    I just want to be laid to rest when i’ve fought the good fight..

    Everyone has their own fight, every day, every 24 hours, every minute, someone somewhere is fighting for their life, their ideology, their believe, or some people just fight because they were told to..

    i’m ‘fighting’ with my inner self, and subconscious mind. its not easy to change the mindset, its a struggle for me. its worth fighting for. every lil thing that changes, it changes for the better.

    FIGHT yooo!!

     

    -Zar

Thursday, 16 June 2011

  • BLah

    I don't enjoy people judging the way I am without knowing the full story. As long as I know what's going on or what I'm doing, do I have to explain myself to you?

    NOT!


     

     

Saturday, 21 May 2011

  • HAHA!

     Now I know your IP ADDRESS!   KENIEL RODRIGUEZ  --lmao! 


    ISP DATA  
    Internet Service Provider Globe Telecoms
    IP Address 222.127.223.71
    SYSTEM
    Browser Chrome 11.0.696.65
    Browser Language English (United States)
    Operating System Windows XP


    GEO LOCATION
    Connecting City Makati
    State Manila
    Country Philippines
    Timezone Asia/Manila
    Longitude 121.0333
    Latitude 14.5667

     First Visit: May 21, 2011 - 09:12:19 AM

     

    Here's your Ip Add you freak! See? I've been monitoring this blog! Busted! I've seen all the entries you've read and all the photos you copied from this blog! Stop Stalking me or else I will ask someone to trace and hack your IP Address!

     

Monday, 18 April 2011

  • the one

     

    Someone asked me this before.. “when would it be the right time? “how do you know if he or she is ‘THE ONE’?”


    i still ponder on those questions… and it probably would result me in comatose. the only thing i know is that when i see ‘the one’, my heart will beat like crazy, and at that moment, i feel alive.

    BUT, there’s a big BUT. BuT what if it was never meant to happen? i mean, if something went terribly wrong before and things kinda got messed up and you just can’t be together with ‘THE ONE’? is there such a thing as.. ‘almost close to THE ONE’?

    i’m just coming up with lots of questions. i should focus on getting my butt off the couch and start cooking lunch or something.



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Just a few ideas on what this blog will be about. This is not the kind of blog where I tell you what I did on my weekend and post pictures of all the cool things.. No, it will be just thoughts and opinions I have on certain issues, events or whatever random thing that pops into my mind. Some of you might find my blog very insightful and entertaining. Some of you might think I'm some sort of weirdo who thinks of the stupidest things... well its my blog so I can say whatever the hell I want..


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